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When 2 & 4 Year-Olds Conflict

A few thoughts on conflicts between 2 & 4 year-olds per yesterday’s topic from the MOMS group discussion. Feel free to comment or ask me to expand on this.

** Over the years I have come to understand that conflicts arise as a result of the normal developmental stages of 2 & 4 year-olds. This simple realization has probably been the biggest contributor to me being able to manage their conflicts because I approach the situation with much less frustration. (A note to moms – this is an example of where my experience, hopefully, will be helpful to you. In having so many kids over the years I can see patterns that I couldn’t see when my own children were little.)

** Two strategies that have worked for me are: 1) explain to the 4 year-old that the 2 year-olds behavior (e.g. taking toys or knocking down blocks) is really because the 2 year-old too young to understand how to play; 2) ask the 4 year-old if they want to help teach the 2 year-old how to play.

**This works because it gives the 4 year-old a sense of control in a situation where the 2 year-old seems to have taken the control away. Two things that are important in doing this are 1) to remind the 4 year-old that teaching is not the same as ‘bossing’; and 2) to give the 4 year-old the choice to not always have to play with the 2 year-old for times when the 4 year-old just needs his or her space.

Becky

CrabbieMasters 1st MOMS Group :)

Thought/Question of the day…

Yesterday, after my ‘first time out’ ‘full-blown PowerPoint presentation’ with a MOMS group in Golden Valley, MN, during the Q&A time a mom asked for suggestions on how to handle some of the conflicts that happen between her 2 & 4 year-olds.

Since yesterday, I have thought of a few examples to share that may give further insight regarding reasons for the conflicts and how to manage them, but, between running preschool today and having my Tuesday night parent education group, I probably won’t be able to post again until some time tomorrow. (This post is from a handwritten note I gave my husband so he could put it on here now.)

In the mean time, until I can get back to the blog tomorrow, please feel free to comment on your own experiences with conflicts or anything else that comes to mind.

Becky

ALL DEC '09 POSTS ARE JUST TO TEST "HOW TO DO STUFF" -- YOUR IDEAS WELCOME! :)

ALL THIS ‘TECH STUFF’ IS VERY NEW & TRICKY SO YOUR IDEAS TO TEACH US “HOW TO DO BETTER STUFF” ARE ALWAYS WELCOME!!

All ‘test posts’ below are always set up as posted in December 2009 no matter when they were tested. This is just stuff to see how to do things and to keep them around for reference so we don’t have to remember all this tricky techie stuff…new ideas are always welcome!!!!